Thursday, January 15, 2009

It's freakin' snowing.

There's something you all need to know about me. I feel as though it's a piece of information vital to our relationship. I've tried to hide it from you, but to no avail. It's time to come clean:

I hate snow.

Not like, a little. A whole lot. Unnatural, inhuman amounts of hatred. I can't stand to be near it, play in it, or drive on it. Especially the last one. I am epically bad at driving in snow.

So, today, when I woke up to see what I considered to be a snowstorm of apocalyptic proportions, I was less than enthused. My partner says it was only a couple flurries, but I refuse to be coaxed into enjoying the snow.

I fishtailed and hyperventilated pretty much the entire way to the highway. I repeated the mantra "ohmygodohmygodohmygod" about nine thousand times just for good measure. One I'd slipped and slid my way into a parking lot, I called in stuck. It's like calling in sick, but with more nervousness and less bacteria. Fortunately I'm one of those people with a total inability to hide my emotions, and I'm pretty sure I accurately conveyed to Niki that snow is the bane of my existence.

My partner, who is fearless and very good looking and exceptionally talented at driving in any condition, came to pick me up. Just to demonstrate how much better he is at this sort of thing than I, he decided to pick up some Man Tools at Home Depot on the way home. I stayed in the car grumbling about how I should have gone to college in Mexico. Ole!

So, now I'm back at school, hiding from the snow, and my poor frozen car is somewhere in a parking lot. Hang in there, Toyota.

I hate snow,

Seth